Finally End of The Week

Today should have been a tank day and I will say I most definitely have earned it. I haven't work this hard in a one week period since I can remember! Yet I can't tank it just yet, not first thing. That's because that project from Coleman and Associates is having its all-day learning thing today, with attendance requested from managers that are the "levers" of the organization, those with decision-making capabilities and influence, a group I most definitely am a part of, I did not have the usual enthusiasm that I normally would have for a project like this. Maybe it's because of all the work this week but I just am not into it today. In fact, I don't mind saying that I feel inconvenienced. Just get it going already, I already know my role, I already know what my teams are going to end up doing. We just do what we do baby. I also fully realize that THAT is my ego talking too and I realized that when I actually got to sit down later on and finally got to my meditation. Couldn't do it first thing you know. That Coleman meeting started at 8:30 AM. I had barely enough time to get my breakfast and Earl Grey in. And even when I did I could feel myself rolling my eyes at some of the tactics of those consultants. I mean... hold up a shoe if a finding stunk? Really? I was NOT holding up a shoe for that shit. I would hold up a shoe for that idea.  

So anyway the part where my attendance was required finished at 10:30, not that I did anything really. I thought it was a waste of time. But I'm a good soldier so I stuck around until the first break and not one silly second longer. I crashed on the couch and I intended to stay there until at least through lunch. I did said meditation and found this video about a lady that had a NDE and talked about us as energy beings and how everything is energy, every thought, every attitude and as such always has an effect. This is why I think the Universe tests me every once in a while, as if asking if I truly believe what I am saying or doing or feeling.  It is just another reminder of how closely we must watch our thoughts on a moment-by-moment basis. It brought back some of the negative thoughts I had had all week, particularly regarding Lisa. And that the only way to release... is to FORGIVE. But not just the other person. You must also FORGIVE yourself. I know I'm going to get tested again tomorrow about that aren't I? LOL. Gotta learn. It ended up  being sunny by mid-day, so much so I got up off my ass and walked to Subway to get lunch. Should have done El Pollo Loco. But I changed up and I am not really sure why I did that LOL. Felt like i ate crap. I did eat enough to get a 25 minute nap in in the middle of the afternoon, that's pretty good. And then I reminded myself I needed downtime from all the activity of the week. I did that by watching the new movie DUNE. This story is already a re-telling of the 1980s version, the one with Kyle McLachlan and an overacting Sting. I did not like that version. Kind of reminds you of 70s Battlestar Galactica. The technology in moviemaking was not there yet. And this new version was more on point to the original story I think. Although it only told half the story. There's a Part 2 coming for sure. But I liked this part very much. And I also saw parallels to this story to some of the Star Wars plot lines. The Obi Wan Kenobi character. A coming of age just like Luke Skywalker. It was definitely entertaining.  And with the ramen I had for dinner from Mitsuwa, it made for a pretty good Friday I thought. That ramen wasn't enough though and for the 4th Friday in a row, I made a pit stop at Taco Bell, getting 3 soft tacos to fill me up. Fill me up they did and now I was bloated going to bed. This did not end up being a typical Tank Friday. I was still thinking about work at 4 PM. As in I was approving timecards. When do I actually approve those things on a Friday? Still I was able to do some reflection and even did so I was doing my steps for the day. I certainly provided as much value as I could this week, and even though I don't think enough ears and eyes got to see that value, I'm confident it will have reached whoever it needed to reach and that I get the energy back in kind. Karl seemed to be impressed, so much so he wanted to see my presentation. Yeah I want to look back on it too. I think it's something I can be proud of. I ended up not going to bed until 1 AM. I hate that I do that when Johnnie isn't staying with me. All I did was to calm my brain enough to go to sleep. And then tomorrow is a fairly big day, at least for Johnnie. Can't wait...