Saturday, May 1, 2021

The Things Kids Say

Johnnie's AHA. One thing about spending time with Johnnie these days is that he has shown he has a capacity for understanding well beyond his years that is hard to believe. But then again maybe all kids do it's just that us adults dismiss them. And sometimes, most of the time really, the delivery can take you by surprise. Case in point we're driving home from Target today and out of the blue Johnnie says "Dad, I know how you and mom don't have to be divorced anymore".  To say the statement took me by surprise is an understatement. And so I asked: "How Johnnie?". The reply was about as insightful as it got. "You guys just have to do stuff together".  He hit the nail right on the head didn't he? At that point I had to tell him that mom and dad just got to the point where they didn't like each other more often than they liked each other and so that's why they stopped doing things together. The answer was equally as insightful. "You can just start doing things together little by little can't you?". Wow. And then he revealed why he asked the question. "Sometimes it's lonely just doing thing with just her and I." And all I could do was say I understood. And so I pivoted to asking if he got lonely doing stuff with just me. Again an insightful answer: "Maybe when you do to much work in front of your computer dad". Whew. Talk about feeling guilty. I had to explain to him about my job and that I had to spend time in front of the computer because that's what I get paid to do. I promised him I'd spend less time on it though, although I'm not sure exactly how I would follow through on that particular promise. Now mind you this happened around lunchtime. By then Johnnie had taken a nap for more than an hour and a half on the couch. I picked him up at Lisa's at 7 AM, and he was already having breakfast. But he hadn't showered yet. So I brought him to the apartment, gave him a shower, and brushed his teeth. And THEN he knocked off on the couch... 
While Johnnie was sleeping on the couch, I was able to get in an audiobook on the Kybalion and the hermetic principles. I figured I needed to get back to basics.  In that hour I got ME time in sitting on the couch next to him while he napped. And dealt with all that emotional stuff from yesterday fairly effectively I thought. I got the reminder that I was yet again being tested and distracted and I needed to hold on to my focus and the truth that I can always control my reaction and perception. And that I could always choose what I wish to experience. With that said Lisa picked up Johnnie at 3:30 PM and off they went to a playdate with Simon as she usually does on Saturdays. She also invited me over for dinner since she had all this extra food from Panini Grill. Kabobs! What a treat! And I won't have to cook tonight. But then I was probably also thinking about what Johnnie said this morning. Did that have any influence on tonight? Because Lisa made it clear it was optional for me to to come over. My choice. And I did choose to go. And so it was that I had a pretty big dinner over at Lisa's tonight and it was fairly non-eventful... other than instead of playing UNO like Johnnie wanted, we turned on Disney to test her remote control. And because it flashed ever so quickly, Lisa checked out the new Mighty Ducks series on Disney, her old patient Emilio Estevez being on it and all. And we spontaneously watched two episodes! I can't remember the last time Lisa and I watched TV and Lisa laughing as had and as loud as she did tonight. I think it was Santa Clarita diet more than 3 years ago.  It would seem that tonight JOhnnie got his wish. Mommy and Daddy did stuff together, even though he himself was bored and didn't really like the show. We did do a game of UNO right afterwards and I did finally win a game. And then off I went on home. I didn't want to put any significance on my time at Lisa's tonight. It was just a spontaneous family night was all. And that is perfectly ok.

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