A Tired Monday

I woke up this morning already tired because I had stayed up binge watching the Blacklist. Still. Why I do that I'm disappointed in myself. But at least it got me to stay "put" and do some morning meditation first thing. This week is Tech Council Meeting week so right away I knew today and tomorrow would be dedicated to doing my presentation for that. And despite being tired I still saw no reason why I couldn't keep up doing 15,000+ steps Monday today. I sort of flipped the activity this morning, which was to say I had breakfast first. Centered on my meditation, enjoyed my Earl Grey hot tea and THEN finally headed out for a walk. By this time it was already closer to 10 AM and I did the circuit going to BofA and then around Sepulveda and back and actually did make 5000+ steps and 40 active mninutes by the time I got back to the apartment. Hey it WAS a nice still-unusually-not-cold morning. And the streets were fairly empty (see pic). I did some "I'm a millionaire" mantras too. BTW I also know full well I am more than 90% of the way there already which puts a smile on my face. So tired or not, I was on track anyway. And I felt ok. Of course, every time I put something calming on YouTube, I had the urge to close my eyes and at one point actually did so and did a 15 minute powernap. Hey that's all I needed as it turned out to get re-energized. And I did another 3500 steps picking up lunch at Marie Callender's. French dip with onion rings. Mmmm. By now I have this routine to finish my Tech Council Presentation. And as it turned out the Communications Meeting is earlier that morning so I could present snippets of that as well. But it was Monday and I was getting pinged left and right actually. So much so that my plan of finishing the presentation by tonight did not actually pan out. By the time it was dark and closer to 6 PM, I had done 14,000+ steps and 110+ active minutes so at least THAT can be out of the way. And then I sort of waited for Lisa's call for the Johnnie pick-up.

It was too much to ask for this to be a routine pick up though and really I don't know why I would have thought that. Silvia is in town <though I have yet to hear from Lisa> and I'm sure Lisa had made some last minute plans, just as I'm sure she simply didn't think to tell me about them. Lisa being Lisa. For me it is a reminder that "everything is me pushed out" and then somehow all this reflects my own energy. An energy of impatience. An energy of irritation. I needed to be irritated at something I suppose. Why not Lisa doing the very things she does so often. I drove over to her house since she wasn't answering her calls. It was probable that she was in Pasadena. It was also likely that she picked up Johnnie early and went there. It was 7 PM by the time I heard from them that they were, in fact, in Pasadena. And that Johnnie was not feeling well. Surprise there. Highly likely that he had stayed up with mom and Silvia and apparently he has now slept for the last few hours. gee when did THAT happen last? The last time he stayed up with Lisa was what. And I picked him up sick the next day Friday. Smh. I had no doubt he was not sick at all. I had every belief that he was simply catching up from being tired. Fucking Lisa smh. They would not actually drop him off until more than an hour later, close to 8:30. Of course they dangled around doing stuff. I just vented and raged to myself, cussing Lisa out internally about how thoughtless she was and how she NEVER thinks about my feelings and what I'm doing. By the time they got to my apartment, none of all this stuff that I was thinking was expressed obviously. I suppose it didn't need to be. But the fact that I was whisking Johnnie in to my building without any clothes on because he had apparently thrown up on them was already a bunch of weirdness. And then the fact that he asked for penned and chicken soup immediately was also not a surprise. He eventually caught up with the Monday routine he was used to, which was to eat up, dessert included. And then he pooped some bad stuff out, presumably breakfast from this morning.  And then I let him stay up for just a tad longer. He was still asleep by 10 PM anyway. I will let him catch up on sleep then. Because he wasn't sick at all. Was he tired? Obviously. As I was. I needed to catch up on sleep too. We all did, Johnnie, myself, and even Claire the dog.  Now we're going to get back to routine...